Hey all,
I just wanted to follow up on my bemused post yesterday and hopefully add a little detail to my sketchy reasons why poker is loosing its appeal.
Firstly though thanks for the comments guys, its good to know that I'm not the only one Amatay, and also that when others have gone through something similar (Cadmonkey and Drunkenmonk) that a little time away from the tables has helped.
Here's my problem, or what I think it is. Poker, its a long term game. We all talk about or experience variance but over the course of say 12 months luck should even itself out and if we make the correct decisions over and over again then those little donkaments that suck out on us in January should, in theory, have swelled out bankrolls by December.
Now I'm feeling a little dejected with this whole long term thing. Maybe its my current situation and the fact at 26 years old, without a care in the world, a great career, great girlfriend, a dream holiday to the Maldives only weeks away I was told I had cancer. Yes, everyone has their setbacks and this is just that. I'll be better in a few months and only missing the dream holiday to the Maldives which I had to cancel and take a rather hefty financial hit on but it got me thinking about how planning around such long term gains/objectives can be a little dangerous.
Say all this happened and I was in a huge downswing, I'd be stuck for a few months and could end up fecking myself up even more as I try and chase my losses to get out of the position I'm in coupled with the unfortunate events that have befallen me. Not good.
So one, planning for variance seems like a very risky business. What I mean here is positive variance. So, brushing off that runner runner straight because in the long run you'll get your money back seems quite a scary thought.
Another area of concern for me at the moment is fitting poker into my life. I feel like my prior ties have changed completely. Its like I'm starting to feel and new exuberance for life and a deep need to do anything and everything I can. So yes I'll probably travel more, eat out more etc, the standard easy things to do but I also what to do other things and I don't know how poker can compare against them at the moment. For example its Saturdays morning, lovely day, about 9am. I can play poker for 2 hours and still head out for lunch, meet some friends or I can go for a walk, head to the market or something and try something new. What do I do?! Well at the moment it feels like heading to a fricking market is winning!! The idea of sitting in front of a computer screen clicking on fold, raise etc only to be sucked out on or earn $25 in an hour seems crazy. Yes there will be thrills along the way and I may even suck out on a few people as I chase positive variance but the thought of heading outside, on a nice warm day, taking my time to wander about, experiencing some of the nicer things in life (say I'm at Borough Food Market...go there if you haven't, amazing!) seems so much more appealing! Aarrgghh!!
I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't know what sitting in front of a computer clicking on buttons can beat. Meeting friends, market, gym, movie, restaurant etc all seem so much more appealing!
So what does this mean for me? No idea to be honest. I'm going to take some advice and take a few days off. I'll still be updating the blog etc so don't worry but playing wise am just gonna take it easy, play some PS3 or something and go from there. By the way, Virtua Tennis 3 comes today which should be fun. Have a buddy coming round on Friday who thinks he is gods gift to gaming so have bought this as the great equaliser. I've never played it, i don't think he has and it will remain in the shrink wrap until he gets here so all is fair!
So thanks for listening, I don't know if any of this made any sense. You may think I'm mad and nothing could be better then online poker, maybe I've forgotten the thrill etc that everyone gets so please feel free to remind me, it might just chivvy me along again!
Now its time for some beans on toast and a boiled egg! Lubbly jubbly!
Wombol
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7 comments:
It makes perfect sense Wombol.
After what you've been thru Im pretty certain I wouldn't waste much time playing poker.
But then again I'm a lazy sod...
GL Bud.
Despite what you're going through your posts always seem upbeat. Do you think that now the Chemo is basically doing it's job it is affecting your mood? Sometimes you can start to feel down or whatever months after a said event. I hit a shit spot a couple of years ago because in the space of 6 months my gran died, I became a dad, was burgled and moved house and for some reason something went and I felt like shit! The same happened a couple of months back too, I was sat thinking about how my life was just 12-18 months ago and it got me down.
Take a short break from the tables and from your normal routine in general. I know it's difficult to do with you undergoing treatment but piss off to the coast, build some sandcastles, splash in the sea, get massively overpriced fish and chips. Do something that made you laugh as a kid and it makes you feel great. When you feel more refreshed start a "Send Wombol to the Maldives" challange and earn your holiday back. By the way, I went there in 2002 and it was awesome (Vilu Reef).
Keep your chin up, could be worse you could be a Charlton fan! Oh shit, I forgot! :o)
Borough market is wicked. I met June Sarpong there. I totally agree with the last comments. If you aint getting no fun out of poker leave it alone for a while. One of my best friends died on Christmas day, had a bit of a barny with the familly and went home to play some Drunken poker. It was a total disaster. Lost over £100 and probably spoilt a lot of peoples xmasday by giving them random verbol abuse. Stopped playing for a month after that and came back like a king. Lost over ~£600 with my stupid drunken gambles but had fun while I was doing it. Thats why I started my blog.
Anyway, I've travelled all across Europe, North America, and India, and imho the best place in the whole world is Cornwall in the summer. Come down for a pint of Cyder mate! I actually know where to get cheap fish and chips as well.
Hey wombol!
What you're saying makes perfect sense... Take a break from poker and do whatever you feel like doing..
Anyhow, I must say I admire how you seem to deal with life even with chemo treatment!
I can't even begin to imagine how awful that must be but the way you seem to be dealing with it I definently think you are gonna come out stronger on the other side...
Keep positive mate
We all there for you. The present seems pretty shitty but the future is so bright.
Paul
Wombol Poker
I love to play poker but from the moment I started I made myself the promise that it may not influence my social life etc…(even left a big freeroll as chipleader cause there was a parade in town and I promised my Godchild that I would go with him) Poker is fun as a hobby and for most players it is nothing more than a hobby. Only a few players can make big bucks from it. With your situation I can completely understand that Poker has not the Top Priority at the moment and probably never will again. Such moments in your life, makes your appreciate life even more.
I wish you a speedy recovery!
Cheers,
Dremeber
http://dremeber.blogspot.com
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